Skip to main content

Your Future Spouse (Part 6) - Narcissism and Mental Illness Revisited

Image
By
+
JMJ

I realised that I missed a couple facets of narcissists and want to address that short coming.

First, prospects who have this problem (and it is a problem) are normally very charismatic and charming. They can be enthralling story tellers, the life of the party etc.

... they are also adept as telling half-truths and lies. So if a person tells you fantastic stories about themselves that capture your imagination - perhaps you should step back and look at this critically.

This is why it is very important to be aware of and explore the characteristics of a prospect in detail.  I've heard it said, Catholics can try the Seminary or Religious Life, but CANNOT try the married life.

Second, mental health, especially in this day and age is a factor to consider.  The pressures and stressors of modern western culture are significant and in my experience, these act as triggers or enhancers for mental health issues.

Catholic married life has enough stressors that avoiding a partner with a mental health issue is not cruel but prudent.

One other aspect is that there is a difference between an eccentricity and a mental health issue. For example, a person may be sensitive and have low self-esteem because of their background and how they grew up.  They may be able to grow beyond this ... because everyone has eccentricities.  It is only when these adversely affect their ability to function in society that they are really a problem.

So, while narcissitic sociopathy should disqualify a prospect, eccentricities should not.

A friend read part 4 of this series and had some germane comments (edited for brevity):

I feel people are starting to apply narcissism to everything and everyone. I think it's starting to lose its mean. There is so much of narcissism material/youtube/etc.... that I wonder who is the narcissist and who is the victim. The new modernist ideas about morals and the break down of the family all goes hand in hand. So relating it back to finding a Catholic Spouse it will become harder and harder to find people that are not narcissistic because our society will be conditioning people to behave that way. So looking at the foundation/environment that the person is raised will be a factor of consideration when considering a Catholic spouse.
Narcissism falls under Cluster B Personality Disorder: "Cluster B personality disorders are characterized by dramatic, overly emotional or unpredictable thinking or behavior. They include antisocial personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder."     ( Sources: Mayo Clinic, Mental Help: Ten-personality-disorders-clusters). People with narcissism can have more then one of the cluster B personality traits. People with Cluster B personality disorder medication will not help .... only cognitive behavior therapy will help and this only if the person wants to help themselves. Cluster B Personality Disorder can go along with Cluster A and C Personality Disorder traits too.   Such as Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal  anxious, fearful thinking or behavior, and obsessive-compulsive personality disorder.
Sum everything up when looking for a spouse considering the persons mental facilities/health is a must!!! To point out narcissism is good but we should not over look the main issue.... The persons mental health stability overall.
So, I hope this helps!

P^3

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Curious Case of Steve Skojec and the Dangers of Deep Diving into the Crisis Sub-Titled: The Failings of Others

By
 + JMJ It's been a while now since Steve Skojec sold 1P5 and abandoned the Catholic Faith. I've been a 'Trad' since 1982 and in those 40+ years I seen this death-spiral before with a similar end point. It seems that anyone who jumps into the fray unprepared for the enormous task of righting wrongs will, eventually, become discouraged by not the task but the people who surround them.   I remember when Skojec complained of the treatment his family received from a traditional priest.  This seems to have been the start of the end for him. So what can we learn from the likes of Steve Skojec, Michael Voris (maybe?), Louie Verrecchio, Gerry Matatix and other celebrity Catholics? Probably quite a lot about what not to do. First, don't burn out on the crisis?  When you burn out, on work or anything else, little things assume a more greater importance than they are due.   This is one of my 'canary in the coal mine' signals that I've been stretching myself too th...
Post a Comment
Read more

Dogmas of the Catholic Faith (de fide) - Expanded Listing

By
+ JMJ A friend had mentioned that he has seen a longer list of truths of the Faith than the one I posted here .  I have finally discovered it online. I have yet to completely determine what dogmas were missed in the original, those I have found are highlighted. Source: A List Of The Dogmas Of The Catholic Church - Fr. Carota Alternate Source: Referencing Ott   Posts Listing the Dogmas of the Catholic Church Dogmas of the Catholic Faith (de fide) - Expanded Listing: Answer for Reader (Oct 2022) Updated List of Teachings of the Catholic Church (Oct 2021) *** Dogmas of the Catholic Faith (Oct 2015) De Fide teaching of the Catholic Church (Apr 2013)           *** Latest version    
1 comment
Read more

De Fide Teachings of the Catholic Church (Updated)

By
+ JMJ  Update: I was reviewing Ott's work directly and noted that some of the Teachings are De Fide while others are different levels of authority (such as Sent Certa etc).  So please refer to Ott for the actual classification). Posts Listing the Dogmas of the Catholic Church Dogmas of the Catholic Faith (de fide) - Expanded Listing: Answer for Reader (Oct 2022) Updated List of Teachings of the Catholic Church (Oct 2021) *** Dogmas of the Catholic Faith (Oct 2015) De Fide teaching of the Catholic Church (Apr 2013)           *** Latest version  
Post a Comment
Read more

Homily vs Sermon

By
+ JMJ Something that I've noticed is that Modern Catholics use the phrase 'Homily' instead of 'Sermon'. I've often wondered about this difference. Here's what I found Catholic Encyclopedia (1910) Homily: ...Since Origen's time homily has meant, and still means, a commentary, without formal introduction, division, or conclusion, on some part of Sacred Scripture , the aim being to explain the literal, and evolve the spiritual, meaning of the Sacred Text.  ... Wikipedia Sermon: : A sermon is an oration , lecture , or talk by a member of a religious institution or clergy . Sermons address a scriptural, theological, religious, or moral topic, usually expounding on a type of belief, law, or behavior within both past and present contexts. Elements of the sermon often include exposition, exhortation, and practical application.   Catholic Encyclopedia (1910) Sermon: As to preaching at the present day, we can clearly trace the influe...
Post a Comment
Read more

Becoming Traditional Catholic Part I

By
+ JMJ It is a big step from the non-Traditional to Traditional Catholic World. First of all, the Trad world is much smaller, isolated and under siege. This leads to a number of interesting elements that a person making the transition needs to take into account. The Trad World Is Smaller It is a fact that in the states there are about 30,000 Traditional Catholics who support the SSPX and about 3,000 in Canada.  The other Traditionalit orders (FSSP, ICK, etc), I assume, are in the same ball park if not smaller. Let put that in perspective, in my area there are 270,000 non-Traditional Catholics. Consequently, aside from the larger centers,  a Traditional 'Parish' or Mass Centre will be 200 people or less. This has the advantage of being like an extended family and cozy. It has the disadvantage that any crazy 'uncles' in that family will be in plain sight. Be forewarned that any eccentricity that would be drowned in a sea of people in a non-Traditiona...
Post a Comment
Read more