Your Future Spouse (Part 3) Justice

JMJ

Asking the two question from Part 2 are probably easier than answering them ...

As a quick refresher, the two questions were:

Man asks: Is this a woman that I can love above myself, can I nourish her (I don't mean just with the basics of life) and cherish her?

Woman asks: Is this a man to whom I can respect and honour enough to willingly submit?

I believe the key will be to understanding the level of virtue that each prospective spouse possesses. (NB. from this point I'm going to list the 'prospective souse' as 'propect' ... a little sales lingo, but I don't have time to think of a better label.)

My study of the virtues culminated in this article, and I think the first place to plumb the depths is their relationship with their parents and siblings.

This falls squarely under the virtue of Justice and we can expand on it.

Justice is basically giving everyone what they deserve. A quick aside, not what we think they deserve... but what they deserve - because of their relationship with the 'prospect'.

Hints and Thoughts

Principle:

In watching the person do they demonstrate a sense of Justice, giving what respect people deserve because of their relationship with them?

Religion:

What is their demeanour at Mass?
Do they go to the Traditional Mass?
Do they have a grasp of the difference between the Novus Ordo Missae (NOM) and the Traditional Missae?
Can they understand and come to the realisation that the orientation of the NOM is man and therefore not giving its due to God?

Piety:

What are their attitude and actions like to their country and even more importantly towards their parents?
Did they have a good relationship with their parents?
Are they the children of divorce?
How is their relationship with the parent who did not have primary custody?
How about their relationship with the parent who had primary custody?
Do they have an obsession with blaming one of the parents?
Do they have to bring up some tragedy in every conversation?
Is every conversation drawn towards the challenges that they have faced and overcome? (more on this later in the series ... if I remember).
Do they respect parents because they are their parents ... or because they were 'nice' to them.
Nota Bene: This is all incredibly important because if they come from a broken home where there was huge (or even moderate strife) they will probably have a malformed notion of what it takes to be a good husband / wife.
Caveat Emptor: Tread very carefully if the prospect doesn't have a solid family experience either through the early death of a parent or divorce.

Gratitude

Are they grateful for what they have received, understanding that God has ultimately given them everything as a free gift?
Nota Bene: As noted in this article on gratitude, a Traditional Catholic who isn't grateful for the free gift granted by God will, probably, at some point become bitter and discontented. Their 'Traditionalism' isn't built upon humility, but ultimately pride. Watch out because this can lead to a particuluar narrowing of perspective which is worse than blindness because they will only see what is right in front of them (figuratively where they want to look).

Liberality

Are they generous of spirit? This is important because being a parent requires generosity!

Affability

Do they treat all people with the same kindness and respect? This is where it is important to watch how they interact with other people, who they favour with their attention, who the ignore etc.

Ok so this looks like it is negative ... and it is. Why? Because the absence of virtue is more important that its presence. A person can grow in virtue, but if the prospect has significant issues with any of these virtues, then tread lightly and carry a big Crucifix in front of which to pray if you've developed an attachment to this person.

Steal yourself to make a big sacrifice for the right reasons, and discuss your observations with someone wise who you respect and trust. Someone who has been married for a number of year with a number of children would be a good bet ... obviously your parents are a good point. Additional counselors are also good because your parents may be biased in some ways and a 4th party may help to bring perspective to the ruminations.

P^3

The Catholic Church and the Rule of Law- Part II: Dr. John Lamont

+ JMJ This is the second article from Dr. Lamont from his lecture given in May 2014. P^3 Source Part A: Society of St. Hugh of Cluny Source Part B: Society of St. Hugh of Cluny 8 May2014 The Catholic Church and the Rule of Law- Part II By John Lamont To understand how the Jesuit conception of obedience departed from earlier conceptions, it is helpful to compare it with the teaching of St. Thomas on obedience. The fundamental difference between the two is that St. Thomas considers the proper object of obedience to be the precept of the superior (2a2ae q. 104 a. 2 co., ad 3). Obedience that seeks to forestall the expressed will of the superior does not bear on what the superior wants or thinks in general, but only on what the superior intends to command. St. Ignatius’s lowest degree of obedience, which he does not consider to be virtuous, is thus what St. Thomas considers to be the only form of obedience. St. Thomas holds that St. Ignatius’s alleged higher forms of o...

Open Letter to Cardinal Gantin - July 6, 1988

There has been some discussion (read lots) about the term 'Conciliar Church'. I have posted this letter written by the Superior General and District Superiors of the SSPX after the 1988 Consecrations. Of particular interest is that the 'Conciliar Church' being referred to as a system. My paraphrase would be that the SSPX regards the 'conciliar Church' as an error within the Church. Source Open Letter to Cardinal Gantin Prefect of the Congregation for Bishops

Morning and Evening and other sundry Prayers

+ JMJ Along the theme of P^3 (Prayer, Penance, Patience), and for my own reference ... here is a collection of Morning and Evening prayers from the Ideal Daily Missal along with some additional prayers. In this crisis of the Church, I do not think it is possible to do too much prayer, penance and have patience. P^3

Rome and the SSPX - Version 2026 Part 6b: Principles and Rules for Surviving this Crisis of the Catholic Church (Principle 1)

+ JMJ Principle 1: Realize that something is amiss in the Catholic Church The world in which I had my Traditional Awakening, is one in which practically anything pre-Conciliar such as liturgy, doctrinc, and even dogmas are either suppressed, ignored or re-framed to be acceptable to the ‘world’. What is more, the people adhering to these pre-conciliar teachings and liturgy are persecuted by other members of the Catholic Church. The things that non-Trads say about Trads can be quite extreme. For example, accusations against Traditionalists include that they are: A revival of the Jansenists (link) , Schismatics, Heretics, Uncharitable, Lefebrists Radicals Integrists When one group of Catholics is persecuted by the others for simply wanting to live as Catholics before them did for generations … well something is wrong. Further, we need to realize that when what was previously condemned is now promoted and what was previously promoted as the trut...

How is the SSPX prepared to accept the Second Vatican Council??? - Reblogged and Updated.

+ JMJ The Archbishop remained steadfast. In the 1980s, in his correspondence with then-Cardinal Ratzinger, Archbishop Lefebvre stated his position that the criterion for interpreting Vatican II in light of Tradition comprises three elements: 1) He and the SSPX would accept anything in Vatican II that is clearly consistent with Tradition; 2) Any ambiguous texts of Vatican II must be interpreted strictly according to Tradition; according to the consistent teaching of the Church throughout the centuries. 3) Anything in the Council that cannot be interpreted according to Tradition should be revised. The Archbishop laid this out explicitly in his letters to Cardinal Ratzinger in 1982 and 1985. CF News: Rome-SSPX: Background to the Doctrinal Discussions CF News: The April 15 Deadline A few years ago Tony La Rosa (aka ecclesia militans a Toronto based 'resistor') had a difficult time accepting this approach to the council. He held that it must be completely tossed as...

Tradicat

Search This Blog